5 Lamest Things About the Season 3 Premiere of HEROES

Season 3 of Heroes premiered last night and I was only kinda’-sorta’ pumped since last season was lackluster and all I really wanted was to have Journeyman back, but I sat with the two hour season premiere through the good and the bad.

Let’s take a look at the bad.

Hiro’s new nemesis, The Speedster. How. Fucking. Lame. She seems like a character plucked straight from a made-for-Disney-Channel movie. I hope she dies.
Nikki. Is she still here? Seriously? I mean, yeah, she looks good in lingerie and would look even better in my lap, but she needs to go away. Oh, I’m sorry, her name’s not Nikki anymore because she has a bajillion personalities and this new one has the ability to freeze people. Big deal. Also, her one nostril is REALLY distracting and I’m sure she’s done her fair share of playing around in the snow - if you catch my drift.
Plot holes. Okay, so what ever happened to Claire’s emo boyfriend? Not that I care (I hated that guy), but they should at least give some sort of explanation. There’s also the little fact that Claire’s dad had his memory erased by the Hatian, but somehow knows more about the villains than anyone else. Maybe I missed something there…
Dr. Suresh’s plot being taken directly from one of my favorite films of all time, The Fly. As soon as he started hinting at injecting himself with super power juice, it was so obvious. What happened next? This Indian motherfucker’s climbing on walls and talking all fast and crazy JUST LIKE A CERTAIN GRENDELFLY!!! And as if that wasn’t enough rif-offery for your bitch-ass, they went and pulled the gross-out effects in front of the bathroom mirror! I’m surprised he didn’t start pulling out teeth.
Claire whining so much about not being able to feel pain. What the fuck!? Are you kidding me? “Waaa. Boofuckinghoo. I have shards of broken glass in my hand and I can’t feel anything. I’m not human.” Bitch, what is your deal? You have the powers of a god and you’re getting all melodramatic about it? Shut up and go make a sex tape already.

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This entry was posted on Tuesday, September 23rd, 2008 at 3:38 am by brownkidd and is filed under TV + Film. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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Robby "brownkidd" Weiss founded ALBOTAS.COM in 2007 as a way to share his interests with the rest of the world. His iPod contains just under 70gigs of hardcore, metal, 90's hip-hop, chiptunes, anime soundtracks, and dance music. In his spare time he enjoys gaming, customizing designer toys, painting, and making phat beats with his oldschool GameBoy.

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Comments to “5 Lamest Things About the Season 3 Premiere of HEROES”

rob Says:
September 23rd, 2008 at 10:17 am

Hiro’s new nemesis, The Speedster: Yeah she is a little annoying, but to be honest so is Hiro. They are just a side story to fill time.

Nikki: She really isn’t Nikki. I know who she isn’t but I won’t spoil it. But trust me…she isn’t Nikki.

Plot holes: They did clear up Clair’s BF. They broke up after Claire decided she was going to reveal her powers. He wasn’t for her revealing her powers.

Also, the Haitian only erased his memory back till him and Claire went on the run. As soon as the company found him, he knew who he was and who the company was.

Dr. Suresh’s plot being taken directly from one of my favorite films of all time, The Fly: Yes, I thought the same thing…but it is better then his past boring role of a doctor who gets punched in the face constantly.

Claire whining so much about not being able to feel pain: Yeah, seems a little dramatic. I would just think Sylar touched a certain part of her brain and turned off her pain sensation.